Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Freud?

(As recited at the Andy Warhol Poetry Festival held recently in Las Cruces, NM)

Courtesy: ahp.apps01.yorku.ca

(SALEM, Ore.) - Victorians hope to avoid that legacy of Sigmund Freud
For yes indeed, it's not his beard but parts due south that they most feared

In old Vienna, this physician was seeking mind-find ammunition
And thus when his peers coyly winced, his own cerebrum was convinced

That life relies upon aggression but that entails client confession
Often hidden in dream world (once subconscious is unfurled)

He found that humans tend to thrive by giving vent to their sex drive
And if our mating's not completed, our race would shortly be depleted

He theorized at early age that infants enter Oral Stage
Sucking on the mammaries, for a baby this does please

Next stage he focused on the butt, and lest we fall into some rut
Babe turns Anal (fecal prone), squeezing pleasure, groan by groan

What next? Dear Sigmund mulls and culls, and comes up with the genitals
Finding them a buried treasure to touch and clutch for added pleasure

Another point: He meant no malice to mention envy of the Phallus
But I need not get into detail, lest I face a judge--and jail--

That's the basic Sigmund story bringing him the shrinkdom glory
This deed provoked for some disdain, believing him to think profane

Some extolled him, others hid, wouldn't admit they had an Id
While others went forth, si amigo, guided by their Superego

I take no sides nor get neurotic to analyze such things erotic;
But rumor has it, in Toledo, they've just abolished the Libido.

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Salem-News.com Community Writer Barry Lee Coyne brings to our readers stories from his combined career of journalism and gerontology, and explains that these paths shaped his values. This writer-therapist often views the world as the masks of comedy and tragedy placed upon the scales of justice. For him, optimism inevitably wins. "Lyrical Lee" has traveled to 30 nations aboard and was once a press intern at the UN. His first published article was in The NY Daily News in '59, dealing with the need for integrity in public office.

He also launched the nation's first tele-conference on health education for shut-ins, created the Eldermentors project in VA to pair retirees with immigrant students needing role models, and was the main catalyst behind CCTV's "Public Public" panel show here in Salem. Lee received his BA in International Relations and an MSW in community organization. He currently serves as a member of Salem's Library Advisory Board. To send Lee an email, please write to this address: notcoy@netzero.net